mystery

life is a mystery.
you never quite know what will happen.
never thought that i'd turn out like this.

how do you get over this disappointment?
how do you change?

wish that things would just go away and i could magically transform,
transform into a beautiful person
not necessarily outside beauty,
but from the inside out.

From the Inside Out
A thousand times I've failed
Still Your mercy remains
And should I stumble again
I'm caught in Your grace
Everlasting, Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending Your glory goes beyond all fame

In my heart and my soul
Lord I give You control
Consume me from the inside out,
Lord, let justice and praise
Become my embrace
To love you from the inside out.

Your will above all else
My purpose remains
The art of losing myself
In bringing You praise
Everlasting
Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending
Your glory goes beyond all fame

In my heart and my soul
Lord I give You control
Consume me from the inside out,
Lord, let justice and praise
Become my embrace
To love You from the inside out.

Everlasting
Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending
Your glory goes beyond all fame
And the cry of my heart
Is to bring You praise
From the inside out
Lord my soul cries out

In my heart and my soul
Lord I give you control
Consume me from the inside out,
Lord, let justice and praise
Become my embrace
To love You from the inside out.

Everlasting
Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending
Your glory goes beyond all fame
And the cry of my heart
Is to bring You praise
From the inside out
Lord my soul cries out.

Everlasting Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending Your glory goes beyond all fame
And the cry of my heart
Is to bring You praise
From the inside out
Lord my soul cries out

meaning

what is this life really about?
i am such a confused person.
why do i do what i do?
why do i ruin all my relationships.

Lord, thank you for life.
thank you

thank you for the cross (worthy is the lamb)

Thank You for the cross Lord
Thank You for the price You paid
Bearing all my sin and shame
In love You came
And gave amazing grace

Thank You for this love Lord
Thank You for the nail pierced hands
Washed me in Your cleansing flow
Now all I know
Your forgiveness and embrace

Worthy is the Lamb
Seated on the throne
Crown You now with many crown
You reign victorious
High and lifted up
Jesus Son of God
The Darling of Heaven crucified
Worthy is the Lamb
Worthy is the Lamb
Worthy is the Lamb
Worthy is the Lamb

emotions

''be strong and courageous. do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go''
Joshua 1 v 9

my life is so funny.
you really have to laugh to get through the ups and downs.
had to go back to work after two whole weeks off....arghh....painful!

i received another christmas card today.
when i opened it, it really made my day



in all of my years, i have never received a card quite like this one!
it literally made my day.

i couldn't really sleep last night.
not sure why.
i even went to bed around 11pm and tossed and turned until past 3am.

i went to the hospital to see fahad after work.
ended up talking to his mum.
even though i've known her for quite a long time, this time was the longest conversation i've ever had with her.
she is an amazing woman.
i really pray that fahad will pull through ok.
i know he will.

your LOVE never fails
Nothing can separate
Even if I ran away
Your love never fails

I know I still make mistakes
But You have new mercies for me everyday
Your love never fails

Chorus:
You stay the same through the ages
Your love never changes
There may be pain in the night but joy comes in the morning

And when the oceans rage
I don't have to be afraid
Because I know that You love me
Your love never fails

Verse 2:
The wind is strong and the water's deep
But I'm not alone here in these open seas
Cause Your love never fails

The chasm is far too wide
I never thought I'd reach the other side
But Your love never fails

Bridge:
You make all things work together for my good

light

''in the beginning God created the heavens and the earth''

Genesis 1 v 1

arn't you glad that God created light.
without light, you really won't see anything.
I just remember one time when it was dark.
and i mean DARK, as in there was ZERO light.
it was in 2005, i think
I was working with HUSSO on a summer playscheme.
we had to take the kids on a residential away thing for 3 days.
it included canoeing, absailing, caving.
the caving was awful
we spent ages climbing through caves in the dark and wet.
at one point, the instructor told us all to switch off the light.
it was dark.
no amount of time would allow your eyes to get accustomed to the darkness to feel your way around.
it's pretty scary when you think about it.

thank you God for creating the LIGHT.
thank you for being the LIGHT of this dark world.
you are the hope, the life.

誰是主角

在這燈飾璀燦都市中
萬闕歌聲喧染都市中
耀眼燈飾彷似千串夢
沒有一首可以稱與頌
凝視每串夢裏的景緻 晚空裏飄送
旋律佈滿玩笑的音韻 晚空裏飄送
誰是這節日裏的主角
誰是這節日裏的主角
你懂不懂?
誰又會懂﹖
他身穿紅衣 還是身穿粗衣麻布
他靜靜降生人世 還是以雪車到步
他輕聲溜走 還是應許一生懷抱
他賜予百千玩意 還是賜與眾恩典到老

thankfulness

''for the JOY of the LORD is your strength''
nehemiah 8 v 10

started this year with going to New Life.
I know I haven't exactly been the best of Christians, but need to desparately seek out God again.
need to be in that place with God.
i'm not exactly used to being 'quiet' and resting in God,
but i need to.
i really do.

We had a thanksgiving service this afternoon at the Chinese church.
it was a kinda like an open-mic session.
we took it in turns to go up and share.
it's good to hear people
hear their stories.
It's great that we have a big family in Christ.
It really is.
For that, I am thankful.

thank you God for being faithful,
even when i have run, and am still running.
when i look back at 2011...it has been terrible.
but i remember pockets of joy: God's love and grace.
when i look around, i see all of the blessings and people that God has given me.
more than i comprehend.
more than i would ever deserve.

so, let's give thanks.
and keep on giving thanks all the days of my life.

Give Thanks

Give thanks with a grateful heart,
Give thanks to the Holy One,
Give thanks because He's given Jesus Christ His Son.

And now let the weak say "I am strong."
Let the poor say "I am rich."
Because of what the Lord has done for us
Give thanks.

hello 2012

''Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!''
2 Corinthians 5 v 17

it's another year.
may it be a good one:
a year walking with God
a year walking for God.